Further Reflections

First off, my life has sucked ever since returning to the US. I'm not even being dramatic. The following calamitous things have occurred to persistently plague me:
-Return stress/TFA interview/Brief period of insanity (thanks Honorio and Danny for breaking the cycle, lol)
-Hard drive crashes
-In hard drive crash, I lose a half-written Spanish essay AND the movie that the essay was about
-Spend 4 days straight at my computer writing final music exam, Cine, and Capstone to have them all handed in on time
-Said stress produces a phenomenon called "Trenchmouth"- this happened to WWI soldiers; as they were in the trenches, stressed about being constantly bombed, typically benign bacteria in their mouthes would suddenly attack and cause serious inflammation of the gums
-This happened to me on a Friday/Saturday, which meant that I couldn't see my dentist until Monday
-He still doesn't actually diagnose the infection, and only gives me a pain killer and mouth wash
-Oral surgeon the next day finally gives me antibiotics, but I also need my wisdom teeth out, which, because the surgeons are so busy, cannot do it until May 21
-Fradulent charges appear on my credit card, which I have to cancel
-I get rejected for the TFA job

That brings me to today. Life just sucks right now, although I suspect it will get better sooner or later. I also still realize that life here is better than it is in other places, thanks to an email I got from Yohandy today. He wrote to me about wishing that he could be with me at graduation, and saying that the most he can do is send me positive energy from Havana and hope that it gets to me. It made me think about the machismo that is so pervasive in Cuba, and now I wonder if it comes out of a sense of helplessness, or is at least exacerbated by it, because circumstances prevent men from completely fulfilling the roles that they think they should play. That, in turn, may lead them into thinking even more that they have to exude this extreme male-ness. Just a thought.

Cuba: The Return

I'll have to quote Courtney's facebook status to describe how I feel: I am culture-shocked out of my freakin' mind. You can't imagine how it feels to go, in one hour, from communist Cuba with hardly any advertising, to Miami, with fast food joints and screamingly bright posters on every wall. The consumerism in the United States just smacks you in the face and you can't avoid it.

All in all, it's been a very hard transition. I made a life for myself there, friends, boyfriend, and more or less a second family, and now I don't know when I'll see them again. But out of this all comes the most important lesson for me. It's based on this Cuban phrase which, translated to English, roughly means "We only have one life, and you have to LIVE it". I realized after about a week of reflection now that while I embody that spirit abroad, and I take advantage of the opportunities I have while studying abroad, I don't always do that at home. We have one life on this entire Earth, and the time has come to make sure that I'm happy while living it. If there is something I know I want, and I can reach out and make it happen to bring greater joy to my life, it's time to do it. Grammy always used to tell me growing up that I can do anything I want to, and for a long time I was content to let the academic realm be the place in which I brought that statement to life, but it's time to expand it. No more passing up on happiness. When you have the opportunity, seize it, because you don't know when it will come again. I don't think I could understand how true that was until going to a communist country, where the meaning of that phrase isn't weighed in money, yet means more than gold.

Santiago de Cuba

You know you’re in Cuba when you get on your plane…from the back end…and your seat is in the front. Thus began our weekend trip to Santiago de Cuba. Other than that, the plane was fairly normal; a flight of about a hundred and fifty people lasting about an hour and a half. We then disembarked in the Santiago airport. As we were collecting our luggage, the power went out twice. This could have either been a normal Cuba occurrence or a specific product of the storm passing over Santiago at that moment. No one will ever know. After a long day of class and travel, I settled in to sleep for the night.

Friday was full of activities; in my opinion, the best excursions that we’ve gone on during any of our weekend trips. Frist we made a brief stop by the Plaza de la Revolucion en Santiago. Every major city has a plaza like this; while Havana’s is dedicated (with a huge phallic monument) to Jose Marti, Santiago’s honors Antonio Maceo, another hero of the War for Independence against Spain. After this, we headed to the church of the Virgen de la Caridad de Cobre. The literal translation is the Copper Virgen of Charity, and she is the patron saint of Cuba. People come from all over the country to pray in front of her for miracles. The church was beautifual, but even more amazing was the view from the church of the surrounding valley. We were among the mountains and looking down onto the nearby copper mines (for which the Virgen was named).

I have to comment again on the fallacy of statements made by Margarita Alarcon (see my private blog for notes on her identity). Anyway, during one of our classes, she told us that Cuba is better than the DR becauses here you don’t have people living in poverty in shacks on the banks of a river. Yes, maybe not right in the center of Havana, but yes, you do, around the outer edges, like on the banks of the Rio Almendares. And then here, in the eastern part of the country, MANY people live in such huts. It makes me so mad at Marg, not just at her as a person, but as a symbol for this entire furcked up situation where the government and its representatives think that they are doing such good things to help the people, but yet…I don’t know. And on the other hand, I was thinking of these people in the shacks and trying to put myself in their shoes. Granted, they live in crappy houses. But they lived in crappy houses before the Revolution, too. At least now they (or their kids) have free education, free health care (despite its low quality, I’m sure it’s better than what they had pre-Fidel), and guaranteed jobs and salaries. So maybe for them it really is so much better. I honestly don’t know. I’m leaving this country with even more questions than I had when I arrived.

Next we hiked up a mini-mountain to see a monument honoring the Cimarrones, or slaves who escapted and ran away to form their own communities in the mountains. We found what used to be a well, and its basically a big pit now used for African ceremonies. The best part of it was the artwork. Meg and I were exploring it for a while before anyone else came over, and it gave me this awe-inspiring sense of all the history that weighed down on the moments; on the idea of these people who had been free, then had to endure slavery, but then freed themselves and were able to celebrate and live life again. I can’t really explain it but it was a tremendous feeling, almost sacred in a way.

After this, we stopped in the house of an “espiritista”, or shaman of sorts who uses all different sorts of techniques and rituals from the different Afro-Cuban religions in order to perform healing (or other?) ceremonies. He had some of the most beautiful artwork I’ve ever seen on the walls of his house.

After lunch, we stopped by the “Morro” of Santiago. Just as the Morro in Havana, here it is a fort on the seacoast meant to defend the city. Santiago’s was built in 1515. After this, exhausted, I passed the rest of the day in bed.

Saturday morning we departed for Guantanamo. Despite being told by various people that it was not a city for tourists, we all insisted on seeing this town which has been so closely linked with the United States over time. The drive there felt like we’d been transported back to the time of dinosuars. I swear I saw the head of a brachiosaurus peeking out from the mist as we drove through the mountain valleys. It was so beautiful and unspoiled. It is so different from the western part of the island, and reminded me so much of the Dominican Republic. Actually, this whole trip reminded me of DR. I guess people are right when they say that the eastern part of the island is more Caribbean that Havana and its environs- I definitely felt that way. It gives you almost a thrill, an animalistic sense to look at the countryside here- you feel a raw energy flowing through you.

The other thing I noticed on the way was what I’ll call hero stones. Basically, a lot of people had in their front yards a group of stones with the names of the 5 Cubans who are imprisioned in the US. The people in here would also have stones saying things like “they will return”. Seeing things like that, or pro-Fidel graffiti, always makes me wonder if it’s genuine and spontaneous, or demanded by the local brqnch of the CDR (Committee in Defense of the Revolution). Again, who’ll ever know.

So everyone was right about Gitmo. Not a tourist town by any stretch of the imagination. It definitely was poorer than Havana, although prices also seemed lower. It’s also clear from the amount of attention that we received from men that they are not accustomed to having foreign women in town. Other than that, it was a pretty quiet and sleepy town. We walked around, had lunch, and headed bacck home. Much to our chagrin, you can no longer even see the American military base from a distance. Apparently, Cubans would go there to “visit” and swim from a certain lookout point to Gitmo to get asylum. So now the Cuban military prevents anyone from getting too close.

Saturday night we went to a tumba francesa. It’s descended from the French contredanse music, and was brought to Ccuba when French plantation owners brought their slaves with them from Haiti as they were fleeing the slave rebellion which became the Revolution. So what we saw was a mix of French singing and dancing with African drumming- a great blend of aesthetics, and I really enjoyed the show. Also very exciting were the roles that two women had in the ritual. There were some women singing, dancing, and playing the maracas. There was also one woman drumming, and another, who led the singing, filling in one of the male dancer roles. The latter may have just been because one male dancer couldn’t make it to the show, but to have seen a female drummer was especially exciting; this Arara African tradition is a huge departure from all the other African drumming ceremonies that we’d seen in the past. Very impressive, in my opinion.

After that, we went back to the hotel and relaxed all night. I felt like perhaps I didn’t take enough advantage of Santiago and the time we had there, but for me it’s like a rest period. I know that I’m heading back to spend the last week in Havana with my boyfriend, and I figure that we will be doing all different trips and sights that we never saw the past few weeks- aka, little sleep for Tara.

The last event of Santiago was a trova concert on Sunday morning. Trova is related to the old European troubadours, musicians who would roam with a guitar and sing about current events. Fun fact: later trova in Cuba turned into protest songs, and they were greatly influenced by American artists like Pete Seeger and Bob Dylan. I’ll close this blog by talking about the first singer. She paused between songs, and was talking about life. I’m paraphrasing a bit, but the general message was “we only have one life, and you have to live it”. I cannot count on all my fingers and toes the amount of Cubans who have said that same phrase to me during my time here. I think it explains a lot about their resilience and in some cases their willingness to break rules or defy authority. With so little to look forward to, there’s this necessity to seize every opportunity for happiness, however short it may be, or however much pain it brings you in the end.

Our country is so screwed...

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The Marines know nothing about Cuba, despite the fact that they are stationed here. I have little hope for our country after hearing all that went on last night...

Here's the deal with the party last night. We take a taxi to the address we were given and get out on a dark street in front of a barbed-wire fence compound. It reminded me a great deal of the military compound that gets attacked in the movie "The Kingdom". Within the compound were some houses, a pool, a nice yard, and a gym. We show up and thankfully as we walk in we see one of the FSOs who had talked to us earlier in the day. She pointed out the bar and told us to head on in. The barmen and -woman in question were actually the Marines themselves, so upon ordering drinks we also began making friends. In particular, I was interested to talk to the girl. I found out she was only 21 and had been in the Marines since turning 18. She served in Iraq and Senegal before coming to Cuba, and during this has been working with the Department of Homeland Security to earn a degree in Terrorism (just a suggestion, they should probably call it something different, although in some ways the US has practiced that itself over the years). Annnyway, I asked her if it was difficult to be a woman in the Marines, and she said yes, because first, it's more physically demanding and you don't get any slack (which is ok, but...), while at the same time you have to work twice as hard to earn people's respect even when you can complete the physical tasks. Figures.

After three green (hey, it was St. Patty's round 1) Sprite and 7 Years Rum, I hit the road for a dance club with Whitney and our boys. Meanwhile at the Marine House, peeps kept drinking green beer and discussion slowly opened up. We probably would have better opinions of them if it hadn't. More or less, none of the people stationed there really like Cuba. Why? They mostly don't leave their house. When they do, they go out in Miramar- read, really touristy and rich area where no real Cuban will do. Are they allowed to date or even really fraternize with Cubans? Not so much. What do they really know about Cuba? Nothing. BUUUT, they think lots of hilarious things. Like that it's a really dangerous country. When the girls told them we leave the city, they asked what kind of security measures we have! Please, children. It shows not only a lack of knowledge about the country but also a lack of understanding of the politics between our two nations. THIS IS A VERY SAFE PLACE FOR AMERICANS. The Cubans want the embargo gone. Something happening to an American here would be a deathblow for that dream. We are fine. Speaking of the embargo, there was a Marine who was apparently oblivious to what that even means. REALLY?? They also are convinced that the Commies are spying on us all the time, and that they are so good at it, we don't even know. But...how would they know, if they never leave the barracks? Anyway, it was just really depressing to me in a lot of ways, because the Marines also work at the Interest Section. And the Interest Section is the info-gathering arm of the US in Cuba. AND NONE OF THEM KNOW JACK SHIT BECAUSE THEY DON'T MEET CUBANS. I'm thinking of Sarah Palin all over again... I really feel that I might know just as much about Cuba as our diplomats here. Mom, I know you think it's ludicrous when I make this claim. But it's true. And maybe the worst part of it is that it comes from the top- it's American-enforced that the Marines don't interact much with the Cubans. Plus, the only Marine here that speaks Spanish is the Sarge (or whatever) in charge of the operation. The rest of them? Maybe a little here and there. What use are they?? Barack needs to consult our group- or the other American groups studying here, for that matter- to create policy, as we actually talk to Cubans and know what's going on. Right now I feel so angry that I could almost cry. Ignorance is killing the world.

We Have to Go Back, Kate

We went back to America today. More correctly, we went to Switzerland. That is, we visited the American Interests Section in Cuba, which is formally a part of the Swiss Embassy here. The US doesn't have an actually embassy because we don't have formal diplomatic relations with Cuba. It was a terrific visit (MUCH better than the Egyptian embassy visit where we just got the party line), and I wanted to share with you all some edifying bits of information. This photo is our professor Dr. Brown getting us into the building.


-First of all, the purpose of the US interest section is A) to help US citizens living here; B) to help Cubans who want to visit the US or receive asylum there; C) gather as much information as possible to send to US for analysis, this is especially important right now because Obama is reviewing our policy on Cuba so all the information they can send at this point in time is good. Their job with C, however, is made difficult by the fact that the Cuban government is very closed and cautious, and although the US FSOs try to arrange meetings with people in the Cuban government, the Cubans are slow to do this, try to avoid it, and failing that, the meetings are often denied by the Cuban government anyway. So the US often has to go through third party countries like Spain or Mexico, although they don't get a whole lot more information that we do either.
-The US interest section actually runs an internet cafe in order to give Cubans better access to the internet, and specifically, to international news. They have between 40-45 computers and get 100s of people each day who come in to use them. The one downside for the Cubans is that having visited the American Interest Section can have a negative effect on career mobility; depending on your job, you might have a harder time getting promoted if you've used the internet.
-Also regarding giving Cubans access to news, there's a scrolling news bulletin on the side of the building (although the Cuban gov't erected about 50 flags in front of it in an attempt to block the news. This originally started because the US wanted to use Jose Marti (Cuban national her0) quotes which would improve the US in Cuban eyes. Nowadays, on 4 days of the week, they choose different national or international news stories to scroll on the board just so Cubans know what's going on. One of the most recent and most interesting examples was the murder of a priest in the Villa Clara province about a month ago, which was never reported in the Cuban press (Dale, this is a somewhat roundabout answer to what you asked me about the press before- they just don't bother with the things they don't want to report).
-Very interesting tidbit, which corrects some erroneous reporting that I did to you all earlier. The US does in fact have economic ties with Cuba- in fact, we are Cuba's 4th largest trading partner in the world (behind Venezuela, China, and Spain). Last year alone, we did $717,000,000 USD worth of sales to them, in the form of food, medicinal supplies, and telephone poles. Fascinating, and proves that Margarita Alarcon is as crazy as her father. See my private blog for the full scoop.
-One final interesting piece of info. For Americans who travel here illegally, if anything should happen to you, the US Interest Section does not get you in trouble with the government- they do not enforce the travel ban, and will help you if you have problems while in the country. Wish I had known that earlier, but it's good to know for future reference.

Today was a busy day; we also visited the University of La Habana for a brief tour (the photo on the left was taken on the steps of the school). We were supposed to meet with some students; somehow that didn't happen. Now I'm about to work on some Teach for America paperwork and rest up- while at the embassy, we got invited to a Saint Patrick's Day party at the Marine house in Miramar. Green beer and jello shots, they told us. I'm really curious to see a Marine compound and find out more about the American expat community here in Cuba, so I can't wait to go.